mindset

Institutional Betrayal

By: Betsy Pownall

Institutional betrayal is a term that refers to a betrayal of trust or harm by an organization or institution upon the individuals it is responsible for. It can occur at work, school, religious institutions, or any organization. UO Professor Psychology Emeritus Jennifer Freyd developed the theory and defined it as “a wrong perpetrated by an institution upon an individual dependent on that institution”.

Institutional betrayal can take several forms that include:

Negligence

Negligence or failure to prevent abuse is one of the most common forms of institutional betrayal. For example: when a school fails to address bullying or harassment which can deeply affect a student’s sense of self.

Punishing Victims and Whistleblowers

Institutions that take action against individuals who report wrongdoing or abuse perpetuate a culture of silence and fear within the organization. This behavior can range from victim-blaming to firing, retaliating, and pressing charges against employees who speak out about unethical practices.

Cover-ups

Institutional betrayal can involve efforts to cover up wrongdoing to protect the institution’s reputation at the expense of the victim. For example: property owners living near toxic landfills prior to them being labeled a Superfund Site, such as Rocky Flats Plant in Boulder, Colorado, or the Love Canal Niagara Falls, NY.

Failure to Respond Adequately

If an organization doesn’t respond promptly to allegations of wrongdoing or abuse, it can make individuals feel betrayed. Inadequate responses could involve ignoring complaints, skipping investigations, and giving minimal assistance.

Normalizing Abusive Content

This includes institutions downplaying or ignoring abusive behavior or practices, making them seem acceptable or routine, which will create a toxic environment. For example: the abuse that has occurred within religious organizations in the name of god.

Some general characteristics make institutions vulnerable to institutional betrayal. These characteristics include:

  • Membership requirements: a clearly defined group with strict requirements for membership often precedes institutional betrayal, as conformity is valued and members have the potential to self-police.
  • Prestige: When institutions or their leaders play an elevated role in the community, their potential to perpetrate abuse may be deeply hidden. Leaders may lead with an assumption of trust and dependency which can be problematic when abuse is occurring, as to report the abuse would mean breaking an important relationship
  • Priorities: If Performance and reputation are valued over the well-being of members, the potential for abuse and the cover-up of abuse is high. Institutions may emphasize “maintaining appearances” above all else.
  • Institutional Denial: This is best described when an institution has had allegations of abuse waged against it and it  “others” the victims, casting doubt on the truthfulness of the allegations of abuse.

Coping with institutional betrayal can be challenging. Here are some strategies:

  1. Seek support
  2. Tell your story
  3. Advocate for change: many survivors become advocates for change to prevent future abuse from happening.
  4. Self-care
  5. Legal recourse: consulting with a lawyer can help victims explore their rights and choices

The impact of institutional betrayal can be deep and long-lasting to the individual. It can cause emotional distress, mental health issues, a diminished sense of trust in the individual, and social anxiety. 

Advocating for change and holding others accountable can give individuals a sense of agency and empowerment and has the potential of restoring trust in institutions that are meant to protect and serve others.

The Center for Institutional Courage (CIC), founded by Jennifer Freyd, PhD in January 2020, is a non-profit dedicated to research and education about institutional betrayal and how to counter it through institutional courage. CIC believes, “courage sees a figure where our institutions act courageously: with accountability, with transparency, actively seeking justice, and making changes where needed despite unpleasantness, risk, and short-term costs”.

Sources: 

“What is Institutional Betrayal and How can it Affect You?” (2023) ImPossible Psychological Services. 

 Center for Institutional Courage, https://www.institutionalcourage.org/

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Shifting Your State of Mind

Our state of mind plays a pivotal role in how we perceive and interact with the world around us. 

You can learn to optimize your state of mind to suit the situations and challenges you face.

 Here are a few strategies to help you make this shift:

Mindfulness and Meditation: Practicing mindfulness or meditation can help you become more aware of your current state of mind and learn to shift it intentionally. These practices foster a sense of presence and awareness, allowing you to recognize when you’re falling into a narrow mindset and gently guide yourself back to a broader perspective.

Exposure to New Experiences: Stepping out of your comfort zone and trying new things can naturally broaden your state of mind. Whether it’s learning a new skill, visiting a new place, or meeting new people, each new experience adds to your repertoire of knowledge and helps shift your perspective.

Gratitude Practice: Regularly acknowledging and appreciating the positive aspects of your life can foster a broader, more positive state of mind. Gratitude helps shift your focus from what’s lacking to what’s abundant, encouraging a more expansive and optimistic outlook.

By actively working to broaden your mental perspective, you can enhance your creativity, improve your mood, and become more open to new experiences.

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Unlock the Power of Sticky Goals

As we dive into the excitement of a new day, it’s an opportunity to harness the power of sticky goals to pave the way for success. Setting goals is easy, but sticking to them requires a unique approach that sparks motivation, fosters commitment, and ignites passion. 

Enter the “sticky goals” concept – the secret sauce that transforms dreams into reality. While the idea of setting SMART goals is well-known, the often-overlooked stickiness factor holds the key to lasting success. As our favorite apps and games keep us hooked with their engaging features, sticky goals captivate our attention, fuel our motivation, and keep us on track toward our objectives. 

So, whether you’re striving for personal growth, financial prosperity, or simply aiming to live your best life, it’s time to embrace the challenge of making your goals sticky – and watch your dreams take flight. 

Embrace the Power of Selectivity

Embrace the art of selectivity by prioritizing the goals that truly matter to you. Resist the urge to scatter your focus across numerous objectives; instead, channel your energy into a select few that align with your passions and aspirations. 

Keeping your goals in mind will pave the way for sustained commitment and unwavering determination.

Visualize Your Success:

Start with the end in mind and vividly describe your desired outcome. 

Whether it’s picturing yourself living your dream lifestyle or achieving a personal milestone, harness the power of visualization to fuel your motivation and guide your journey toward success. 

Level Up With Gamification:

Transform the pursuit of your goals into an exhilarating game of progress and rewards. Inject fun and excitement into your journey by gamifying your objectives.

From earning points for completing tasks to treating yourself to small rewards, gamification adds a playful twist to goal-setting, making it both enjoyable and engaging.

Break Down Your Goals Down:

Rome wasn’t built in a day, and neither are your goals. Break down your aspirations into bite-sized tasks or milestones that are easily achievable. 

By taking small, consistent actions, you build momentum and ward off overwhelm and anxiety. Embrace the power of incremental progress and celebrate each small victory, knowing that every step forward brings you closer to your ultimate destination.

Cultivate Self-Compassion: 

As you navigate the ups and downs of your goal pursuit, remember to be kind to yourself. Mastery takes time, and setbacks are inevitable. So, instead of dwelling on your shortcomings, practice self-compassion and patience. 

Treat yourself with the same kindness and embrace the journey with an open heart and a gentle spirit, knowing that every step forward is a testament to your resilience and growth.



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Mending the Broken

By: Betsy Pownall

There is a 2,000 year old text buried in the Mishnah, or the oral Torah, a book of Jewish oral traditions, that includes an ancient practice of dealing with grief and loss. In her New York Times essay, “Two Lessons from an Ancient Text that Changed My Life”, Sharon Brous describes a pilgrimage ritual where “hundreds of thousands of Jews would ascend to Jerusalem,” climb the steps of the Temple Mount, enter the plaza and turn to the right, circling counterclockwise, as a group of thousands. 

Meanwhile, “the brokenhearted, the mourners (and the lonely and sick) would make this same ritual walk but they would turn to the left, and circle in the opposite direction: Every step against the current”.

As the mourners walked clockwise, they would meet the eyes of those walking counterclockwise, who would ask, “Why does your heart ache?” and the mourners would answer. “My son is sick” they might say. “My father died and I never got to say these last words to him”. Those walking on the right side would offer a spiritual blessing that includes the words “You are not alone”.

When one is in pain the world is eclipsed, and felt experience is telescoped into a tiny pinprick of feeling of pain. The world surrounding this pinprick is dark. Nothing else seems to matter, and the feeling of loneliness can feel interminable. This ancient exercise allows the person feeling broken to be seen, felt, and held by others, as they pass. Everyone acknowledges that while today I might be walking on the right side of the plaza, offering a blessing, next time I could be walking on the left, needing the blessing to stay afloat. None of us are immune.

Ms. Bouse offers two insights she has taken away from this text. First, she says, if you are mourning a broken heart, don’t isolate yourself. Move toward people and communities who can support you, and hold you in this time. And, when you feel strong, show up for those in pain. She writes that when we see someone who is emotionally struggling, “asking, with an open heart ‘Tell me about your sorrow’ may be the deepest affirmation of our humanity, even in terribly inhumane times.” While we cannot make another’s pain disappear, we can connect and support the other so that they are not alone in their grief. Approaching another when they are grieving means “training ourselves to approach, even when our instinct tells us to withdraw”. Calling, reaching out, going to the funeral, the wedding, the birthday, “err on the side of presence”.

Ms. Bouse’s second insight is that while human beings generally gravitate toward what they know, this tribal instinct “can be perilous”. She suggests that “one of the greatest casualties of tribalism is curiosity”. When we do not try to understand or imagine what another person may be experiencing, “our hearts begin to narrow”. We become less compassionate, more assured in our own existence, and less humble in the face of the other. 

As a society, she asks, wouldn’t it be transformative if we learn not to be afraid of the other? That we learn to hold each other “with curiosity and care…we learn to see one another in pain, to ask one another “What happened to you?” These “sincere, tender encounters” remind us we are all connected. It is in our connection we can heal our broken hearts.

Rabbi Brous is the founding and senior rabbi of Ikar, a Jewish community-based in Los Angeles, and the author of “The Amen Effect.”

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The Positive Effects of New Experiences

If you’re someone who shies away from change, the transformative science behind new experiences might just alter your perspective. While the idea of stepping outside your comfort zone may seem daunting, it explores the profound mental health benefits that come with embracing the unknown. 

From reshaping neural connections to boosting mood regulation, unravel the secrets of cognitive and emotional well-being, and explore a life of boundless possibilities. 

Rewires Your Brain

Give your brain a makeover! Novel experiences are the secret sauce that stimulates neuroplasticity. 

It’s like a brain workout, enhancing cognitive flexibility and breaking free from those negative thought patterns associated with depression. Who knew change could be so liberating?

Increases Social Interaction

Social interaction is your golden ticket to reducing feelings of isolation and loneliness often associated with depression. 

Many new experiences involve interacting with others, whether through group activities, classes, or simply sharing an experience with friends. 

Boosts Confidence: Strut Your Stuff

Conquering new challenges isn’t just about skill acquisition; it’s a confidence booster! 

Whether you’re mastering a new skill or waltzing out of your comfort zone, each positive experience adds to your self-worth and self-efficacy. It’s time to strut your stuff! 

Reduces Ruminative Thinking

People with depression tend to ruminate on negative thoughts and feelings. 

Engaging in new experiences can redirect your focus away from rumination, providing temporary relief from distressing thoughts. Time to break free from that negative thought carousel!

Helps in Focusing on the Present

Experiencing something new often requires being present in the moment. This mindfulness can help you let go of past regrets or future worries and focus on the here and now. 

Savor the here and now – it’s like a therapeutic spa day for your mind.

Inspires a Sense of Purpose

Embarking on new adventures is more than a mere change of scenery; it’s a transformative journey that can profoundly impact one’s sense of purpose. 

New experiences act as catalysts, stirring the soul and inspiring individuals to redefine their purpose. For those navigating the complexities of depression, each new encounter becomes a stepping stone toward overcoming challenges and discovering a renewed sense of joy and fulfillment.

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Rekindling a Sense of Awe

 

By: Darcy Knight

Remember when you were a kid and the world just seemed a little more amazing?  Maybe it was seeing a rainbow, splashing in a puddle, or just the ability to spend hours eagerly searching for the perfect stick, digging a giant hole in the sand, or staring in wonder at all of the bugs you can see in one shovel full of dirt. 

That feeling has a name and it is awe.  Dacher Keltner, a psychologist at the University of California, Berkeley, and the author of Awe: The New Science of Everyday Wonder and How It Can Transform Your Life, defines it as the “feeling of being in the presence of something vast that transcends your current understanding of the world.” 

But as we become adults we get more distracted by the responsibilities of life, the to-do list, the never-ending adulting.

Is it worth it to try to also fit in some time to find some positive awe in your life?  Keltner says yes, as experiencing awe can produce many positive effects. It makes us calmer, kinder, and more creative. It creates a decreased focus on the self and can therefore be at least a temporary cure for self-absorption, helping us to gain perspective.  In his book, Dr. Keltner writes that awe is critical to our well-being.  His research suggests it has health benefits that include the release of oxytocin, which promotes trust and bonding, as well as calming down the nervous system.

It increases feelings of connection to others and can increase feelings of empathy.  Experiencing awe with others can lead to an increased willingness to cooperate.  It also can increase feelings of meaning or purpose in life and can help us cope with stress and grief.

Awe can increase both spiritual feelings and scientific curiosity. 

And perhaps surprisingly, Awe is credited with increasing physical health.  Dr. Keltner found that awe activates the neurons in the spinal cord that regulate some bodily functions, as well as slows the heart rate and breathing and relieves digestion‌.

Like any new behavior, rekindling your sense of Awe does require some practice.  But teaching yourself to engage in awe-awareness in your daily life can have great benefits. Try one of these ideas starting today 

  • Get out in nature–one of the most common sources of awe is nature.  It is both the vastness that shows us something that is so much bigger than ourselves as well as the often unfathomable beauty. Leave your electronics at home and practice losing yourself in the world around you. Notice the sun shining through the trees, the smell of the outdoors, the songs of the birds.
  • Hang out with a child–Children have not lost their sense of awe about everyday things yet.  Spending time in their world will help you see all that can be amazing in your everyday life.
  • Listen to music–there is a reason that your favorite song can instantly change your mood.  Music elicits emotions that may be harder to access on their own.
  • Explore Google’s Art Emotions Map, which has images meant to elicit emotions.
  • Slow down and take notice of your daily tasks.  Notice the smell of your coffee or tea, the beautiful light at sunset as you are cooking dinner, the moment of joy you feel upon completing a project, or the way it feels to connect with others in your life.

Take a moment to rediscover the awe in your life!

Resources for Rekindling Awe

The Power of Wonder: The extraordinary emotions that will change the way you live, love and Lead

50 Simple Ways to Bring a Sense of Awe into Your Life

Six ways to incorporate awe into your life

Awe-spotting: 5 ways finding awe can transform your life

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Discover the Secrets to Reignite Your Motivation

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“Your life does not get better by chance; it gets better by change.”

Everyone is driven by goals and ambitions, but motivation is the driving force that shapes your path. It’s that invisible push that either nudges you closer to your dreams or leaves you stranded in the sea of complacency. 

Let’s delve deep into the heart of what makes you tick: Intrinsic motivation! It’s the force that entices you to immerse yourself in an endeavour for the sheer joy of it, to find fulfillment in the process, and to relish every step of your journey.

So, if you’ve ever wondered how some individuals stay consistently driven, even when the going gets tough, this exploration into intrinsic motivation is your key. Unravel its mysteries, explore its applications, and learn how to tap into this wellspring of self-propelled determination.  

Discover What Drives You

Ever wondered what makes your heart race with excitement, even when no one’s watching? It’s time to dive into the world of passions—the kind that makes you forget about rewards and recognition. Think about those activities that light you up from within, the ones you’d pursue just because they make you happy. 

Get ready to venture into uncharted territory, explore new hobbies, and make time for the things that leave you brimming with happiness. It’s time to embrace the magic of doing what you love simply because you love it.  

Master Your Goals and Craft a Success Culture

Setting goals is more than just a pursuit; it’s about chasing ones that resonate with your core values. Imagine goals that guide your path and are meaningful, realistic, and not perfect. 

Also, remember to set your space for success. Your ideal work environment shapes your success, whether it’s music, isolation, or peer support. Trust your instincts and create a space that fosters productivity and enthusiasm. 

Remember, your optimal performance culture is where you flourish, so take one purposeful step at a time and embrace the power of chasing your own rules.

Always Strive For Growth

When you embrace the growth mindset, you’re no longer confined by limits or held back by doubts. Instead, you become the architect of your own growth, building new skills and capabilities with every step you take. 

By shifting your focus from end results to the thrill of learning and refining, you ignite a fire of intrinsic motivation that propels you forward.  

This transformational mindset is a secret weapon that boosts your intrinsic motivation, a recognition that success is not a fixed destination but a continuous, ever-evolving journey.

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3 Ways to Power-Up Your Productivity

Do you ever find yourself wishing for more hours in the day? Longing to accomplish your goals with ease and efficiency?

We’ve all been there. You have a list of tasks to tackle, responsibilities to fulfill, and goals to achieve. Yet you convince yourself that a quick phone check won’t hurt. Little do you know, you’re about to embark on a journey down the rabbit hole. 

Whether it’s diving into your email, getting caught up in social media, or aimlessly scrolling the internet, time slips away unnoticed. Suddenly, you wonder where the day has vanished, burdened by unfinished tasks multiplied in your absence. The fleeting satisfaction derived from these distractions soon turns into lingering disappointment or anxiety as unfinished tasks accumulate!

Ready to take control of your time like a productivity superhero and avert the pitfalls of distraction?  Then keep reading as we unveil these steps toward a more productive existence.

Outsmart the Sneaky Rabbit Hole

Oh, the underestimated time you spend in these vortexes!

To unlock the path to productivity, first, acknowledge the existence of the rabbit hole. Despite its seemingly obvious nature, this deceptive phenomenon holds more power over you than meets the eye.  

Start noticing what lures you astray and how much precious time it swallows. Observe your patterns and embrace the power of purposeful attention and shine a spotlight on distraction 

Channel Your Inner Compassionate Coach

Picture yourself as a superhero of self-improvement, equipped with a secret weapon—the firm hand of self-compassion! 

It’s like having a caring parent, a wise mentor, and a cheerleading coach all rolled into one. Stepping into this role for yourself and harnessing this superpower can help nudge you toward choices that promote long-term well-being while helping you avoid pesky unhelpful habits. 

Visualize Your Day

Even before you step out of bed, you have the power to shape your day. 

See yourself gracefully navigating potential rabbit holes, effortlessly prioritizing what matters to you, and taking decisive action. Feel the excitement and satisfaction as if you’ve already conquered the day. Now, rise and shine, knowing you’ve set the stage for greater awareness and intentionality.

Now bring your intentional action plan to life and experience the joy of being the director of your masterpiece!

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Revive Your Spirit

‘Life is meant to be lived, not merely survived.’

We all experience moments when life seems to drain us, leaving us depleted and disconnected from our inner vitality. But fear not because there are simple yet powerful ways to reignite that spark and feel truly alive again. 

If you are ready to discover techniques that will bring back that zest for living you’ve been longing for, then dive in and unlock the secrets to feeling more alive than ever before.

Pursue What Sets Your Soul on Fire

Have you ever noticed a distinct difference in how you feel when you’re doing something out of obligation versus doing something because you genuinely want to? 

This is because your vitality reaches its peak when not only your physical needs are fulfilled but also your psychological needs are satisfied. When you are free to make decisions and direct your behaviours, you tap into a wellspring of motivation. 

So, follow your genuine desires, reclaim your power of choice, and unlock the boundless energy that awaits you.

Discover the Power of Flow

Flow is the state of complete immersion, where you become one with the task at hand, effortlessly gliding through its challenges while losing track of time. By doing activities that resonate with your soul, where time ceases to exist, you become the embodiment of effortless mastery. 

Whether it’s strumming the strings of a guitar, painting, or conquering obstacles, let the flow state electrify your spirit. 

Venture Beyond Your Usual Routine

Research has shown that embracing novelty is the key to feeling truly alive and vital. By immersing yourself in new experiences, whether reading a captivating book or baking a new dish, you can ignite your curiosity and heighten your senses.

So, venture into uncharted territories, and discover the exhilaration that awaits. With each step into the unknown, you’ll find yourself breathing in the essence of life. 

Appreciate the Joy of Being Alive

Lastly, rekindle your appreciation for the basic fact of being alive.

Rather than bemoaning the finiteness of your life, shift your perspective and embrace a profound sense of gratitude for the very experience of being alive. This way, each breath you take, each moment you savour, becomes a remarkable gift to cherish.

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4 Core Values To Help You Live in Alignment With Your Morals

Core values are the guiding lights toward living a life of meaning – they can help you make decisions and build meaningful relationships! 

Show Up Authentically: 

Being your authentic self is easier said than done, but worth it! 

Authenticity is about being true to yourself and your values, even when it’s hard. It’s about being honest and taking responsibility for your actions. 

Being true to yourself and expressing your genuine thoughts and feelings is integral to self-growth and development. It requires self-reflection to understand your strengths, weaknesses, beliefs, and motivations. 

 Practice Gratitude

When you take the time to be mindful and appreciate the good in your life, you open yourself up to a world of gratitude and positivity.

Gratitude is a powerful practice that can help you appreciate the positive aspects of life. Always take a moment to nurture it and be thankful for all the good in your life.

It turns what you have into enough, so pause to notice and appreciate what you often take for granted. 

Act Responsibly: 

Responsibility is the sense of accountability for your own actions and their consequences, thus building a strong character.

It involves acting with integrity and honour, which builds trust and respect. When you have a strong sense of responsibility, you are less likely to engage in unethical or immoral behaviour and are more compassionate and helpful towards others.

It also provides a sense of purpose and builds resilience which is important because it makes you more productive. Without responsibility, you are more likely to shirk duties or miss deadlines, leading to missed opportunities. 

Be More Open-Minded

Open-mindedness involves considering diverse perspectives, ideas, and experiences. It is a positive character value that allows you to think critically and rationally. 

Being open to other ideas and perspectives is essential for understanding the causes of problems and coming up with practical solutions. So, consider different ideas and perspectives outside your comfort zone.

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Setting Boundaries At Work

Leadership isn’t just about what you can do; it’s also about knowing your limits. Boundaries can help you level up your leadership and reach your goals with ease!

Setting boundaries at work is essential for creating a safe and productive environment as they ensure everyone is aware of what is acceptable behaviour. And when we take the time to understand our boundaries, we can begin tackling the more profound challenges we face. 

A lack of boundaries invites a lack of respect. To learn how to communicate your needs, create space for your best selves to emerge and take the time to ask yourself what you need to be your best self – it’s worth the effort! 

See why boundaries are crucial for professional growth and how you can benefit from them.

Builds Trust By Creating a Conflict-Free Environment 

Boundary erosion can lead to a breakdown of trust in relationships.  Creating a conflict-free work-life starts with setting clear boundaries and communicating them to your colleagues. Unfair demands, disrespect, and politics can quickly lead to disputes, so it’s essential to be proactive in creating a positive work environment.

Boundaries help ensure everyone is on the same page and that no one is taken advantage of. 

Helps to Reflect on Your Values and Priorities

When you know what you stand for, you can stand firm. Leadership is about finding the right balance between the needs of those you serve and the expectations of those you lead. So staying true to your values and priorities is important, no matter the challenge.

Well-defined boundaries will allow you to show up more assertively and authentically and act with courage and honesty. 

Reduces Work-Related Stress

 When you set clear boundaries, you will be better equipped to manage your time, energy, and attention, leading to lower stress levels.

While setting limits and boundaries to manage workplace issues, only accept a reasonable amount of work at a time. 

This will help to prioritize your mental health and set boundaries that work for you!

Maintains a Good Work-Life Balance

Leadership is a 24/7 job. So achieving a healthy work-life balance is essential for leaders, as it impacts personal well-being and the success of their organization. You can ensure that both are addressed by defining your priorities, creating a schedule, and learning to say yes to requests and opportunities that don’t align with your preferences or boundaries.

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3 Positive Things That You Can Practice Everyday

The key to greatness lies in your daily routine. 

Strength doesn’t come from running one marathon, a successful business is not built in one day, and a genius mind does not come from reading a single book. It’s the small changes that can make a big difference in your lives.

Spread the Love

Spread the cheer and love by allowing yourself to be happy, in-joy life, and radiate your light! 

Showing love to those around you is one of the most important things you can do to spread joy and positivity! So take a moment to think of ways you can make someone else’s day brighter- including yourself! 

Loving, thoughtful acts and starting your day with a smile can go a long way, and you never know who’s day you’ll brighten up. So, take the time to make a special someone feel valued and appreciated, and both of you will benefit from this outcome in the long run. 

Log Off, Shut Down and Enjoy The Outdoors

Take a break from the hustle and bustle of everyday life and enjoy the beauty of nature!

Take some time to get outside and enjoy the fresh air and soak up the sunshine. Going for a walk or taking your pup to the park can do wonders for your physical and mental health.

So, no matter the weather, get outside and experience the world around you.

Practice Gratitude and Forgiveness

A positive outlook can make all the difference!

Forgiveness and gratitude are life skills that can change your life. 

We can’t control what events happen to us. But we can control how we decide to look at those events.

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