empathy

Saying Yes to Yourself

Are you someone who has a hard time saying no? Do you feel like you constantly put others before yourself? 

Now, being generous, caring and kind are all fantastic qualities to have. 

However, saying yes to everyone around you can have you feeling emotionally and physically exhausted.

When you are constantly running around and doing things for everyone else, you can often forget to leave a little kindness for yourself. 

Only Take On What You Can Handle

The challenge with putting other people’s wants and needs ahead of your own is that you’re often the last on your list. 

If your friend asks you to edit their essay but you’re busy working away on your own – take time to reflect before responding. 

Will helping your friend prevent you from finishing your essay on time? 

If so, you may have to politely decline or offer to help once you’ve finished your own work. 

It’s okay to take a step back and be honest about what you realistically can and can’t handle. 

Practicing the art of saying “no” can get you more comfortable with saying it more often. 

Your Feelings Are Valid

Being told you are “wrong” is not a great feeling. 

Just because someone doesn’t see eye-eye with you doesn’t mean you are wrong. It just means you have a difference of opinion. Your feelings are valid and nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed about. 

Accept The Hard Times

It’s okay not to be okay! 

Sometimes when times are tough, we just have to roll with the punches and remind ourselves that this too shall pass. 

No matter what you say or do, conflict will arise at some point or another, and going out of our way to avoid it can be very exhausting. 

The more you practice, the more natural it will become to put yourself first. 

“If you try to please all, you please none” – Aesop

Read Morechevron_right

Embracing Your Emotions & Letting Yourself Feel

Do any of these phrases sound familiar…

“There’s no need to cry.”

“Don’t be sad. This isn’t so bad.”

“Don’t cry.” 

So many of us have been told by friends and family to hold our emotions back, which can make us feel like we can’t express ourselves.

Even though holding back tears may feel like the “right” thing to do at the moment – holding our emotions in can prolong the healing process. 

Sadness Makes us Human 

Even though experiencing sadness, anger, anxiety, or fear typically isn’t fun, it is entirely normal. 

Sadness is a basic human emotion and is part of what makes us human.

Feelings come and go – but it’s important to have them.

If we didn’t experience sadness, we might not be able to understand and appreciate happiness. 

All of your experiences, both positive and negative, have helped transform you into who you are today.

Fighting Our Feelings

When we’re upset about something, it’s so easy to tell yourself and others that you are fine, when in reality, you are not.

Re-assuring yourself that you’ll be okay isn’t always enough to accept and move past negative feelings.

Take note of your emotions and remind yourself that your feelings are valid and it’s okay to have them.

Processing

Processing and experiencing feelings is part of being human. 

Life is a rollercoaster, and no two days are exactly the same.

Some days will be amazing. Some will be tough. And some will be somewhere in the middle.

We know it’s tough, but it’s what life is all about.

Whether you’re having a good, bad or in-between kind of day, it’s important to treat yourself with kindness and practise coping strategies.

There is no right or wrong way to cope with emotions.

It’s all about figuring out what works best for you. 

“The emotion that can break your heart is sometimes the very one that heals it…” – Nicholas Sparks

Read Morechevron_right

Remind Yourself – This Too Shall Pass

There is no secret recipe for dealing with anxiety since we all feel things in our own way.

But with that being said, there are several different techniques that can help you better understand, accept and overcome feelings of anxiety. 

Keep on reading to learn more. 

Let It Pass

Sometimes we can prolong our anxiety without even realizing it.

The more we think about something, the harder it is to stop. 

The next time you catch yourself feeling anxious, remind yourself that this feeling is only temporary and it will pass.

Here’s some homework for you. 

Think back to the last time you felt anxious…

1) What brought it on?

2) How did you react to it? 

3) Did you use any calming techniques?

4) How long did it take you to feel better?

Remember, you have overcome anxious feelings in the past, and you can do it again. 

Catch Yourself

You know yourself better than anyone.

It’s very normal to experience some pre-anxiety symptoms.  

Maybe you have difficulty concentrating, or maybe your palms start sweating.

It doesn’t matter what the symptoms are. All that matters is that you recognize them. 

Once you recognize them, you can stop whatever you’re doing at the moment and take some time to relax before things start to escalate. 

You can focus on your breathing, journal, take a walk or call a friend. 

Remember All The Things You Can Control

“We can’t control everything that happens to us, but we can control how we respond to things we can’t control.” – Avis J. Williams

There are so many things out there that we can’t control, and that’s okay!

We can’t control whether we get that promotion or what other people think of us.

But we can control our mindset, actions and attitude. Every event has a silver lining and something to teach us. Sometimes the lesson will find you, and sometimes you’ll have to find it.

Read Morechevron_right

So Many Tasks, So Little Time

Do you ever feel like there aren’t enough hours in a day?

Do you ever feel like no matter how hard you work, your to-do list never seems to get finished?

You are not in that boat alone.

Here’s what to do.

Change The Stories You Tell Yourself

The next time you catch yourself, thinking “I have so much to do…”

Hit the pause button, and change the story you tell yourself.

Instead, try something more like this…

“I have a lot to get done today. I have had busy days in the past, and I will have more busy days in the future. I know I have what it takes, and I will succeed.”

Prioritize

We all have 168 hours a week to sleep, work, spend time with family and relax.

If you feel like your lists never get complete, you may be taking on too much.

You have to recognize what tasks can be delegated and which tasks need not be done at all.

Write It Out

You know that feeling when you have a task hanging over your head?

Yes, that is not a fun feeling. It makes it much harder to actually get things done because we’re so worried about what we may or may not forget.

No need to worry – there is an easy fix.

Whenever you’re feeling anxious by all your to-dos, pull out a piece of paper and jot down everything you’d like to get done that day.

There does not need to be any real order or structure. Your thoughts don’t even have to be written in full sentences. 

You are basically just getting all of your thoughts out of your head, and onto paper.

Once you’ve finished your rough notes, you can re-arrange them in order of priority. 

Learn More

Read Morechevron_right

Setting Intentions Instead of Resolutions

Have New Year’s resolutions ever stressed you out?

If so, you are not alone!

So many of us worry we won’t be able to follow through with them or that we won’t set “the right ones.”

Here’s the deal. Typically, we set resolutions based on things we’d like to change in the future.

But why do we have to wait? Why can’t we start now?

Intentions are all about who we want to be in the present moment.

Think about it this way. What matters today may not necessarily matter in a year from now or even six months from now.

We live in a world that is constantly changing, and change can often impact our goals and values.

Now you might be thinking to yourself, “Okay, I’d love to start setting some intentions, but have no idea where to start.”

We’ve got you covered. Keep on reading to learn more. 

Start First Thing In The Morning

Of course, there will always be little things that pop up last minute, but it’s always a good idea to go into every day with some sort of a plan.

Starting out each day with a plan can help you prioritize tasks and know when it’s a good idea to say no. 

Check-in With Yourself Throughout The Day

Have you ever had one of those days that flew by in the blink of an eye? 

Even though those days can be fun, they can throw us off course. 

Every couple of hours throughout the day take a few minutes to think about how you’re feeling. 

Are you feeling rushed, excited, happy, nervous?

Whatever you may be feeling in that present moment, notice it!

Share Your Intentions With a Friend

It’s interesting. Simply sharing our intentions with friends can help them feel more real.

It can also make us feel more accountable to get things done. 

It never hurts to have someone on your side cheering you on! 

Learn More

Read Morechevron_right

Positive Outcomes of Divorce

Going through a divorce is far from easy. It truly is a loss and can even be traumatic. However, even the most difficult situations have a silver lining.

Here are 4 positive outcomes of divorce.

It’s Liberating:

In life, you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do.

You don’t have to stay in a relationship that makes you unhappy or brings on stress and anxiety.

We only live one life. You deserve to spend it with people who make you happy and feel like the best version of yourself. 

It’s Hopeful: 

You know what they say. When one door closes, another one opens. Leaving a bad relationship opens up the door for a new and healthy relationship. There are so many people out there in this world, and you never know who you’ll meet. 

You Get Stronger:

You are so much stronger than you give yourself credit for.

We all have our own grieving process. It may take weeks, months or even years to recover from a divorce. But things will get better.

Every day you will get stronger. Every day will become easier. 

It Can Benefit The Kids:

It’s normal for couples to stay in unhappy marriages because they think it’s best for the kids. 

However, sometimes divorcing is the best thing you can do for both yourself and the children.

It’s important for parents to model healthy relationship behaviour.

Kids pick up on more details than you may think. Seeing their parents constantly arguing or unhappy can impact them now and later in life.

Learn More

Read Morechevron_right

Coping With Video Chat Fatigue

Since most of us are working from home – it’s not uncommon to spend several hours a week on video calls.

Everything from coordinating the call to dealing with technical difficulties can be exhausting.

Participating in several video conferencing sessions in a row can be stressful and draining. 

The good news is, there are several tips and tricks that can help prevent fatigue and burnout. 

Take Short and Regular Breaks:

Some video conference calls can be as short as ten minutes or as long as 2 hours. 

Two hour-long meetings can take up a lot of brainpower – especially if you’re the one doing the majority of the talking.

Actually, walking away from the screen during a company-wide meeting can feel a little awkward, but there are ways you can work around it.

You can step out of the room for just a few minutes to prepare a cup of coffee or do some light stretching.

You may be surprised how refreshed you’ll feel afterwards. 

Try and Find Other Alternatives:

Now, video chatting is a fantastic way for large teams to connect and bounce ideas off one another. It’s also nice seeing familiar faces – especially while we are stuck at home.

However, video conferencing isn’t always necessary for a quick one on one call.

Life isn’t perfect. Sometimes we have to do things we don’t want to do. But at the same time, it’s important to listen to your body and give it what it needs within reason.

If you’re having a stressful day, don’t be afraid to ask your co-worker if your Zoom meeting can take place over the phone or via email instead.

It never hurts to ask.

Take a Step Back:

When you’re stressed out or overtired, sometimes the best thing you can do is take a mental health day or pass on a meeting. 

It’s very difficult to do a job and to do it well when you’re burned out or overwhelmed. No one is perfect. No one can do it all. Never feel guilty for taking time for yourself. Learn More

Read Morechevron_right

How To Survive a Family Members Suicide

Losing a friend or family member to suicide can be extremely painful. It can bring on guilt, shame, anger, depression or anxiety.

We all deal with loss in our own way, and there is no right or wrong way to grieve. Losing someone you love is never easy. However, losing someone you love to suicide can be a little more challenging.

It may take you some time, but you will get through the pain. Here are some tips that can help you cope with your loss. 

Find A Support System:

Losing someone you love is extremely painful. But you don’t need to experience the pain alone.

Opening up to a friend, family member or mental health professional can be very therapeutic. Talking about our feelings can help us better understand them and feel less alone.

You can also do some research and see if there any support groups in your area. Even though you may feel alone, you are not!

Be Patient:

Some days may be harder than others, and that’s okay. Be patient with yourself and allow yourself to feel. 

It’s Okay to Laugh And Cry:

You know what they say – laughter is the best medicine. Participating in fun activities with friends and family can act as a healthy distraction and help take your mind off the pain. 

Every day is a new day. And every day will get a little bit easier.

If you or someone you love are struggling with thoughts about harming themselves or others, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.

You can also text the Crisis Text Line at: 741741

Text Line is free and available 24/7 to support those in crisis anywhere in the U.S.

Learn More

Read Morechevron_right
Want to Improve Your Emotional Intelligence

Want to Improve Your Emotional Intelligence? Cultivate Empathy

,

“Empathy is not feeling what you would feel in a situation. It is stepping beside yourself and adopting another person’s emotion for a few moments. Some research suggests that we succeed at this task by virtue of mirror neurons, or brain pathways that fire whether we’re experiencing the stimulus or we see someone else experience it.” Read on to learn more about How to Develop Empathy in Relationships.

Read Morechevron_right
Menu