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Processing Your Emotions Through Writing

Jaclyn Baker
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Processing emotions is not always easy. 

Sometimes it can be hard to tell if we’re angry, disappointed, confused, excited, or all of the above. 

We all process emotions in our way. What works for one person may not necessarily work for you, and that’s okay. However, regular journaling can be very effective. 

Even if you don’t consider yourself a writer, keep an open mind. Your talents may surprise you.

Here are three tips that can help you get started. 

Make it a Habit 

Journaling daily for as little as 5 minutes can make a huge difference. It’s all about consistency. 

Journaling your thoughts can help you better understand them and potentially bring up ideas you never even realized you had. Now, there may be days where you feel like you have nothing to say.

On those days, you can list out a few things you are grateful for or even doodle. It’s all about maintaining the habit.

Write in Third Person

Addressing yourself in the third person can make it a bit easier to be more subjective. Give it a try a few times and see what happens. 

Think Back 

Taking a trip down memory lane can be incredibly eye-opening.

When we’re so overwhelmed with emotions, it can be challenging to think rationally and come up with a solution. 

Let’s say you got into a disagreement with a friend and aren’t sure what to do. Take a few deep breaths and think back to the last disagreement you had with a friend. 

Pull out a pen and paper and write down exactly what you did last time to resolve that argument. 

Once you have written down everything you remember, see if any of those tactics can be of use today. Every event in life is a learning experience – even events that happened years ago! 

Memories can get fuzzy over the years, but written down thoughts are always with us. 

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Become Comfortable With Being Uncomfortable

Jaclyn Baker
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“The more you seek the uncomfortable, the more you will become comfortable.” – Conor McGregor

Challenge Your Thoughts

When we’re afraid or nervous about something, it’s common for negative thoughts to show up uninvited. 

Just because a negative thought makes its way into your mind doesn’t mean you have to listen to it. 

Whether we realize it or not, we all experience fear and question our thoughts from time to time.

Am I on the right track?

Was that decision wise?

Do people like me? 

Just because you think something doesn’t make it true. Sometimes our thoughts/worries can be confusing and make us feel uncomfortable. 

When something becomes a habit (like worrying) we can often do it without even noticing.

Now, you can’t change a habit you aren’t even aware you have. The first thing you’ll want to do is acknowledge your negative thoughts and question them.  

Why do you think those thoughts entered your mind in the first place? Do you have any proof that whatever you are worried about will happen?

Embrace Uncertainty

Even the most well-thought-out plans don’t always go our way, and that’s okay!

Leaving your house 30 minutes before the grocery store closes doesn’t guarantee you’ll get there on time.  

Studying your textbook inside and out doesn’t guarantee you’ll ace that test. 

There are several things we can do on a day-day basis that can help get us closer to our final goals. 

But even if you do everything by the book, nothing in life is guaranteed. Instead of trying to plan your perfect day, try planning your perfectly imperfect day and see what happens. 

Stare Down Your Fear

When was the last time fear held you back? When was the last time you said no to something you really wanted to do out of fear?

Facing your fears is not something that happens overnight. Depending on the intensity, it can take weeks, months or years to eliminate a fear.

You’ll want to start out doing activities that may make you feel a little uncomfortable, but deep down, you know you can handle.

If you’re afraid to start journalling, write down 25 words.

If you’re afraid to go back to school, spend 15 minutes a day researching programs. 

When in doubt, start small and work your way up. 

“Never let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game.” – Babe Ruth

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How to Conquer Perfectionism

Jaclyn Baker
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Those who constantly strive to be perfect tend to focus more on what’s missing instead of what they have.

It can be tough to feel proud of your accomplishments when you are constantly looking to be perfect.  

Wanting to better yourself and grow is not a bad thing. It all comes down to how to approach it. 

Here are three helpful tips to keep in mind…

Start First, Edit Later

Do you ever find yourself procrastinating on projects because you feel like you just aren’t ready? 

The thought of actually getting started on something can often be scarier than the project itself. 

It’s time to push aside those intrusive thoughts of “I’m not good enough…” and launch right into action.

Keep in mind, no matter what it is you want to accomplish, you don’t have to complete everything in one sitting. Take your time and edit as needed. 

Setting The Bar Too High

It’s great to set the bar high and set healthy challenges for yourself. 

But at the same time, it’s important to listen to your instincts and be realistic. None of us can do everything, and we all have unique strengths and weaknesses. 

We all make mistakes – but we don’t have to let those mistakes define us.

Instead, we can let them shape us. 

Find Meaning In What You Do

If you are ready to embrace imperfectionism try looking at yourself through a different lens. 

The need to always be perfect can cloud you from finding the meaning and joy in what you do. 

Just because you didn’t paint the perfect picture doesn’t mean you didn’t enjoy the moment.

What are you waiting for? Today is the perfect day to start embracing all your wonderfully imperfect parts.

“Life is not always perfect. Like a road, it has many bends, ups and down, but that’s its beauty.” – Amit Ray

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Saying Yes to Yourself

Jaclyn Baker
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Are you someone who has a hard time saying no? Do you feel like you constantly put others before yourself? 

Now, being generous, caring and kind are all fantastic qualities to have. 

However, saying yes to everyone around you can have you feeling emotionally and physically exhausted.

When you are constantly running around and doing things for everyone else, you can often forget to leave a little kindness for yourself. 

Only Take On What You Can Handle

The challenge with putting other people’s wants and needs ahead of your own is that you’re often the last on your list. 

If your friend asks you to edit their essay but you’re busy working away on your own – take time to reflect before responding. 

Will helping your friend prevent you from finishing your essay on time? 

If so, you may have to politely decline or offer to help once you’ve finished your own work. 

It’s okay to take a step back and be honest about what you realistically can and can’t handle. 

Practicing the art of saying “no” can get you more comfortable with saying it more often. 

Your Feelings Are Valid

Being told you are “wrong” is not a great feeling. 

Just because someone doesn’t see eye-eye with you doesn’t mean you are wrong. It just means you have a difference of opinion. Your feelings are valid and nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed about. 

Accept The Hard Times

It’s okay not to be okay! 

Sometimes when times are tough, we just have to roll with the punches and remind ourselves that this too shall pass. 

No matter what you say or do, conflict will arise at some point or another, and going out of our way to avoid it can be very exhausting. 

The more you practice, the more natural it will become to put yourself first. 

“If you try to please all, you please none” – Aesop

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Limiting Your Daily Screen Time

Jaclyn Baker
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How many times do you think you check your phone a day? 

This includes checking emails, texts, social media posts, and even your weather app. 

Chances are, you check it more than you think. 

So many of us tend to have our smartphones on hand or in our pockets most of the day. 

Phones help us stay in touch with the people we love, read, study and more! 

But they can also prevent us from living in the moment and enjoying the little things in life. 

If you’re ready to keep your phone faced down more often and limit your daily screen time, keep on reading. 

Take it Slow

Getting any task done with your phone right in front of you can be very distracting. 

Every single notification can pull you away from the task at hand.

Even if you don’t answer a text or reply to comments on social media right away, just having the thought in the back of your mind can throw you off course.

Setting aside 30 minutes or an hour of phone-free time a day is a great place to start. 

Be Present in Conversations

Have you ever checked to see who liked your newest social media post while video chatting with a friend?

When something becomes a habit, we tend to do it without even thinking about it.

Even if checking your phone mid-conversation wasn’t your intention, it happens.

A great hack is to put your phone in a different room or turn it off while chatting with friends and family.

Out of sight, out of mind!

Remind Yourself That You Are Not Missing Out 

Being the first one to like an interesting post on social media or the first to watch that new video can be fun, but it doesn’t have to be your #1 priority.

When you’re participating in phone-free activities, it’s so easy to feel like you’re missing out on something, but you are not!

You are only one person with only 24 hours in a day. 

And the truth is, no matter how much time we spend planning our day or trying to be more productive, it’s impossible to get everything done. 

There will always be a few things each day you wish you could have tackled, and that’s completely okay. 

Instead of thinking to yourself “Well, what if I miss something important?”

Remind yourself that those notifications are not going anywhere and will be waiting for you. 

Optimizing Your Creativity

Jaclyn Baker
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Sometimes, we need to step outside our usual routine and shake things up a bit.

All it takes is a little creativity. 

Scribble Or Doodle 

Pull out a piece of paper and start drawing whatever comes to mind – really let your creativity flow.

Scribbling or doodling is a great way to channel any worries, stress, goals etc. 

Sometimes certain feelings can be hard to explain or comprehend using words. Drawing them out is an excellent alternative. 

Move Your Body

Sitting down for hours on end can be quite draining.

Even if you’re feeling tired, moving your body in any way, shape, or form can help give you a boost of energy and inspire some great ideas.

Sitting down at a desk determined to come up with a great idea can bring on a lot of unnecessary pressure. 

Going on a walk around the block or practicing some light stretching can help us brainstorm ideas in a relaxed and calm setting. 

Let Your Imagination Take Charge

When was the last time you let your imagination guide you?

When we’re overwhelmed or out of ideas, a little visualization can go a very long way.

Here’s all you have to do.

Take some time to think about the one place that relaxes you the most. 

Alright. Once you have landed on that place, sit down somewhere quiet and imagine yourself there. 

Imagine everything from the smell to the sounds to the temperature. The more details the better. 

Changing up our environment can be very inspiring. However, it isn’t always realistic.

Just because you can’t visit the beach in the blink of an eye doesn’t mean you can’t visualize yourself there. Our mind is a very powerful tool. 

Just Start Writing 

Have you ever put off journaling because you didn’t want to write the wrong thing? If so, you are not alone.

The one thing that makes journaling so great is that it’s for your eyes only.

There is no need to worry about typos, grammar or flow. Writing down your thoughts, fears, and goals can be very freeing.

The first few times may feel a little tough. 

Once you get the hang of it, it’ll become second nature. 

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Anti-Racism Acts You Can Do To Support Asian-Americans and Pacific Islanders

Ryan Scott
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We are so saddened to hear about the hate crimes against Asian -Americans in Atlanta. The Cultural Competency team at Vista would like to increase awareness about the racism that continues to be experienced by those in our communities.   We would like to use this as call to action to continue to look for ways we can be supportive to everyone in our communities, regardless of race, gender, ability or sexual orientation. Below is a helpful article with some  anti-racism resources to support Asian-Americans and Pacific Islanders.  Hopefully it can help us  all to explore ways to continue to  support those in our community as they face these issues.
Some key ideas:
  • Recognize why racism might not be as easy to to see against Asian Americans and share stories to help dispel these myths
  • Don’t dilute language when talking about hate crimes and racism.  Factual information furthers the conversation in helpful ways.
  • Seek out mutual aid efforts.  Policing is not necessarily the answer.  Volunteer to help someone in your community, such as going shopping with them or running errands if they feel the environment is unsafe.  Or write letters to your politicians.
  • Racism against Asian-Americans has been fueled during the pandemic by the former president calling it the “China Flu.”  As we know, words do matter.  If you do hear someone making statements such as these, arm yourself with an argument against this.  Gather information from a wide range of resources to be inclusive of the diversity within the group as a whole.
  • Donate if you are able.  There are several organizations listed in the article if you would like to donate.
  • Acknowledge your own biases

More information can be found at https://www.nbcnews.com/news/asian-america/anti-racism-resources-support-asian-american-pacific-islander-community-n1260467

Not All Decisions Are Easy – And That’s Okay

Jaclyn Baker
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“If you are not willing to risk the unusual, you will have to settle for the ordinary” – Jim Rohn 

Whether we realize it or not, every single day, we make thousands upon thousands of decisions.

Some are pretty simple such as what to make for breakfast, while others can be a bit more complicated such as which job offer to accept.

When we have so many potential decisions to make, landing on one can be very difficult and make us question our instincts. 

Thoughts such as… “What if I end up regretting this?” or “I’m not sure if this is a good idea.” can stop us from going after what we want. 

When it comes to making decisions, of course, you want to feel like you made the “right” one. 

Too often, we can let the fear of the unknown impact or delay our decision-making process.

Sure, in life you may regret a few choices – but you know what? That’s how you grow!

We may not be able to predict what will happen next week, next month or next year, but we can be ready to deal with any potential obstacles and learn how to trust our gut. 

Here’s how…

List All The Pros And Cons

Making a tough decision means considering all sides – the good and the bad.

Break down the options and think about how each side will work out best for you in the long run.

It also can’t hurt to think about how each choice aligns with your personal values.

Think About Other Factors 

Ask yourself, “Who else is there to consider?” 

Think about how each decision can impact not just you, but potentially the people around you.

If you were considering taking a job in another country, that choice might also impact your close friends and family. Don’t be shy to reach out to your network and ask what they think. At the end of the day, the decision is your call, but it can’t hurt to get new insight. 

“Life is inherently risky. There is only one big risk you should avoid at all costs, and that is the risk of doing nothing.” – Denis Waitle

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